Holding My Horses

I've come to accept, our lives will be a series of waiting on others....



We started car shopping over the President's Day weekend. This is what I have my eyes and heart set on. Until we figure out this housing situation with BOA we can't buy a car. Even if we figure out the housing situation today, we need to still wait to put a good down payment on it so monthly will be low. We have our down payment for the house, so we need to save for the down on the car. Also, if we wait until next year, the pay for R's position could exponentially increase and that would make car payments less noticeable, well, I am hoping...

We walked into Lexus and the salesman pretty much turned hubby off. For one, he was really pushy and two, he kept saying, "You look good driving it". R didn't like that statement very much; he could care less about what he "looks" like driving it. He drove an old car (wasn't the greatest looking thing), in college, so looking good isn't a top priority, besides, this car would be for me. The salesman even then told me, you will look good driving it. Though we are Asian and Asians tend to "want" to look good, we aren't that type of people. R is a physician, but if you see him outside walking the dogs or hanging out at the mall, one would not believe him. T-shirt, slippers and shorts are his choice of clothing, likewise for me. Looking good, wearing the "in thing" isn't a priority of ours, and I am happy like that.

Well, as I stated earlier with BOA, yes, we are STILL waiting. Today makes it three (3) since we were supposed to close, but listening to the radio yesterday reminded me, where we are, is where we are meant to be. Like David, God has bigger plans, if we push until we get our way, things will not work out. If we are patient, wait on the Lord, it helps to avoid some sticky situations.

Though the one day we were excited about getting the quote on the carpeting, where we were that morning is where we needed to be. If we didn't go that morning, we would have not known about the neighbor ready to file litigation for damages we had nothing to do with. Now, it's just waiting on the Lord to sort this out....

Cancer: The Pathological Demon

Within a span of weeks, another loss has occurred. This time our condolences go to a good friend of ours as he too lost his Grandpa to cancer.

As dictionary.com defines cancer:

1. Pathology.

a. malignant and invasive growth or tumor, especially originating in epithelium, tending to recur after excision and to metastasize to other sites.

b. any disease characterized by such growths.

2. any evil condition or thing that spreads destructively; blight.

I find it interesting that it uses the adjective "evil". It is indeed evil. It has taken so many lives, and sometimes I find it so hard to accept. As a wife of a physician, and working in the medical field, you hear all kinds of stories (no names or identifying information is ever shared aka HIPAA) about cancer and it's horrible repercussions. Families are never the same and many of them struggle to gain acceptance of this pathological demon. This demon shreds my heart to pieces when the death takes away a parent, or when it involves a child.

About 10 years ago, my Grandpa was diagnosed with prostate cancer, though, it wasn't that, that took his life almost 7 years ago; instead, it was a simple fall. But, that doesn't mean that cancer has never affected my family or I. In fact, stomach cancer took my "Uncle" (actually my step-grandfather), and it also took my life of my Great Uncle, that was a span of a year. Then, there was my friend who recently passed away, he fought long and hard, but this demon, took what was supposed to be the best years of his life.

Today, on the way to getting the hubby to work, we saw an SUV with two girls in the car heading toward in the same direction and the license plate holder was representing JABSOM (John A. Burns School of Medicine). My husband chuckled. Medical school and residency, more so, is still fresh in our minds. Entering medical school is a fun time, your ego is at it's all time high you are one step to becoming a doctor, but not many realize how emotionally taxing med school and residency are; many do not finish both of them without shedding a tear, and if you do/did, well good for you.

When my husband was going through his first two years of non-clinical med school, he was a type of person that couldn't put himself in other another persons shoes. We fought about his lack of empathy, but you know, God would have it. The last two years was a different story, he became a different person, he learned to have empathy for others. He even actually became a softer person than me. It could be the sleep deprivation from long nights on call, or just he became a new person on his own, either way, he has empathy for his patients and their families. It still hurts him when he finds out his patients have gained custody of the demon (cancer) or when his patients pass away.

I'll end this.

Life is hard, pray harder. (Well said.)

Repeating

I feel like I am reliving last February 8th. I have one of the sickest feelings in my stomach, but what can I say, I brought it upon myself. I just need to stop doing this one thing around the same time, maybe hiding under a rock for the month of February sounds better.

Okay that's out. I can move on with the rest of my life now...

Lately, scrapbooking has been on my agenda. Catching up on big life events I, including things from when J was still a youngster. It's amazing how quickly time creeps up on us. Due to this I am going to try and document one happy/thankful thing a day....

Today I am happy for: a three (3) day weekend with my husband, son and daughter.

Valentine's Recap

Happy finish your chocolate day!



I've been busy the past couple of days. I had Valentine's Day activities, scrapbooking and cardmaking. I have decided to donate supplies and my time to Operation Write Home. It's an organization that donates handmade cards to troops overseas, so that they may write home to loved ones. I came across this site from a scrapbook magazine I was flipping through. If you are into cardmaking, you too should donate your time and supplies to a good cause.

Let's see. Valentine's Day. It was actually just another day in the neighborhood except a vase filled with a dozen roses from my love. I made some Vday stuff for R's clinic and J's class, I love the new Spring cartridge from Cricut.



That was for the clinic.



That was for J's class.

The biggest difference in V-day this year was that we went to visit MIL. She appreciated us coming over with a little sweet treat and a potted tulip plant and mini balloon. R was happy we made her night.

3 Down, Just Me Left to Go

Everyone is asleep and I am up watching SNL. I'm a little fuzzy because I took my Benadryl, due to my scratchy throat. I am hoping I can somehow kick this. Hubby is done with his cold, so much so, he went back to clinic. Sigh.

I guess I should get some rest just so I can kick this.

...and still no word from BOA.

Bustin' a Cold

From last night, my husband has had a total of (3) Coldbuster's from Jamba Juice. Poor guy! He took today off to get rest, but little did that happen.

I totally forgot I had the kid's dental appointments. Proud to say, Mr. J has no cavities, but my dear sweet, Little Love had 2. Luckily, the kids dentist is our friends Dad. Z fought the drilling and filling, but she was in good hands, my hands had to hold her down. The NO2 did barely anything for her, in fact she fought that too. Her first cavities and I know why.... Sad. :(

Today we picked up the kids V-day gifts. Z got some Disney Princess stuff that she absolutely adores, due to her love for Ariel and Belle. J got a new Geronimo Stilton book, he's totally into those books and I am more than happy it for him.

Speaking of V-day, the other day hubby and I watched, "You Again". Very funny and cute movie. It's funny cause it really got me thinking of how I was lucky to have my hubby. Our first song we danced to was, "I Do (Cherish You)" from 98 Degrees. Now, how many guys would choose that as our first song? A boy band for that matter? I love him. He's awesome.

The main point of that movie was actually about high school horrors; getting picked on for being geeky, etc. I must say high school was a difficult for me, I guess overall, it was a huge transition. I wasn't picked on, nor was I popular, but I think it could have been better.

I am rambling at this point...

The condo. We are still waiting on BOA. I hope we hear back soon. We are now into the weekend, when closing should have been yesterday and the banks don't really process this stuff over the weekend. I guess a good sign is that the MLS is still listed as, "In Escrow" so that's hopeful.

Well, my antihistamines are getting me ready for bed, maybe that's why I am all over the place tonight.

Face Lift.

For the first time in a long time I gave my blog a face lift. I figured, why not?

I guess it must be a phase, because on top of this blog's face lift, Ando, our Lhasa-chon (Lhasa/Bichon) got a makeover too. I buzzed his hair short, and combed out all of his matted hair. It took 2.5 hours for me to do it, but I saved well over $75! Ando loved getting the one-on-one attention without the other dogs around bugging him.

Today was supposed to be the day we closed on the condo. I haven't heard anything from my Dad as to what is happening with BOA. If I know anything, I know that God has a part in this. I am praying for the best and know all this will come to an end....

Aside from buzzes, face lifts and housing, my Dear R has caught Little Z's cold. It's amazing how much he gets sick now that he's an Attending. It's almost like while he was a resident he had a super immune system and rarely got sick, but now he gets sick every other month it seems. I am praying for a speedy recovery like Z had, and a buffer for me to avoid getting sick all together. No one has time to get sick, but really, I can't get sick because I have Z with me at all times and I am responsible for picking up/dropping off J at school.

Movin' on, as of Monday I am part of that VZW iPhone bandwagon. R dubbed it as my early Valentine's Day gift. In return, I got him one tonight. He would be more thrilled but with post-nasal drip and feeling crummy his celebration is at an all time low. Instead, he is getting a fill of euphoria with a knock out dose of Benadryl.

Due to these unplanned circumstances, I am unable to attend my friend's funeral in CA. I couldn't work around schedules, then Z got sick and now the frosting of the cake was hubby getting sick. I am there in spirit, as I know so many blessed people will be there to celebrate an awesome man who is and will be missed for the rest of our lives. I know he would have been so happy to see everyone there, as he loved having so many friends.

Well, it's time for me to head to bed, got lots to do tomorrow. Praying for health, comfort and happiness.